Diary of an up and coming sociopath

This entry makes the sound of not revising. Instead, I shall indulge in a free flow of doom-sayings and predictions relating to the immediate future of exams. Nostradamus might’ve had the benefit of insane visions of the future but I have the benefit of self-awareness and intution. Not to mention the chance for revisionism when the actual results come in.

Today was Graph Theory Revision Thursday, as I retroactivly have named it, except that I neither revised nor did graph theory. In fact as I write this, it’s not even Thursday. This is indicative of the state of my exam revision each term.

However.

Tomorrow I have no choice but to revise, and I shall do so with renewed vigour, for Computer Networks is, to put things delicately, going to be a complete fucking car crash of unmatched scale. I plan to fail this module in a spectacular fashion. Manchester encoding, TCP/IP, network frames and packets and sliding windows, it’s all steaming ahead towards a seriously huge case of “arrgh-what-the-fuck-is-going-on” the likes of which are unseen since I did GCSE Chemistry. Assuming the coursework achieved a passing grade, all roads lead to the C.

Now, Graph Theory. Good old Graph Theory. The only further maths I’ve nailed since day one. The only maths I’ve seen good use for since arithmatic (okay, and trigonometry.) The only exam that I can guarantee myself an A in for the entire stage 2 course. I think. It’s paradoxical to think I can get an A and yet do little to no revision. I mean, I’m capable, but can I really be arsed? Do I not owe it to myself to at least TRY? Well, maybe. Ambivalence comes at a cost and I think I just realised it. I don’t care when I do bad, but neither do I care enough to do well. Luckily, I don’t care :-) When Saturday comes I believe I’ll have it in me to get the A grade I so richly deserve want need.

So, that leaves the horrid middle child. Human Computer Interfaces. I won’t need to look at that until HCI Revision Tuesday next week. I’ll be honest - I attended half of one lecture, but it was with reason. I forget the reason. I think it was that we had Network lectures beforehand and thus didn’t care enough to stick around for lectures in the afternoon as well. However, I’m not too worried, for the course looks easy. It’s filled with jargon to try and obscure the degree of ease with which it’s possible to pass this module but as a learned man I can glide through such terms as a hot knife glides through the soft yielding flesh of the young, and create an answer filled with counter-jargon to drag myself from the realms of confusion. Perhaps a B, optimistic B+? There was a time I’d have predicted an A, but the passage of time has beaten from me the optimism of olde.

And thus my predictions are set in stone, for to await their unearthing on the day of results judgement, when the sky shall turn as black as night and the seas shall boil like a kettle filled with molton rock. And then if these are right, I’ll take pleasure in informing you all that “I told you so.”

It occurs to me that I’ve got 2 sets of results since starting this blog, yet I don’t remember writing about any of them. I think a personal visit to the archives is in order.