Diary of an up and coming sociopath

Well, that could’ve gone worse. Clearly I was mostly prepared for their questions, though to be honest being asked about my choice of course and uni was something I should’ve, but utterly failed to consider so that threw me for a second, though outwardly it wasn’t much different from the rest of my answers. They didn’t ask the dreaded “What is your biggest weakness” question, which I still failed to prepare a satisfactory answer to. I was first in, so whether that’s good or bad I don’t know, but as I see it at least they won’t have seen anyone better before me.

Now to sit back and await the inevitable rejection\recall.

Incidentally, I’ll be sitting back enjoying my Angel S2 DVDs, which arrived today in a box, packed in some kind of cardboard net.

Sweater: £17
2 Shirts: £10
Shoes: £11
Trousers: £14
2 Ties: £6
Look on my face when I get the bill: Priceless.

Mere hours after that last update, I’m e-mailed to say I have an interview. Fork(). Fork() on sticks. Looks like I’ll be attempting to drag Nikki into town later so that I can look vaguely presentable.

Hmm. No Kraft related e-mail from anyone, either internal or external from the Uni. So it looks like no interview, and hence no need to buy any form of suit :-) Annoying really, a job this close to Oxford would’ve suited me, but I was denied entry at the gates, without even the opportunity to make an ass of myself. Ah well.

Also, in a move that would probably please my father, I’ve gone against every natural bone in my body and e-mailed for more information on an actual part-time job without being pressured. SixTV were advertising for “runners” on the Brookes MOTD, it’s been there since december so I e-mailed, asking if it was still available, and indeed, WTF I’d be doing. The hours are funky and it’s only a few nights a week (9:00-12:30am) so I reckon it’s well within my scope. I wouldn’t even have to get up for it! I’ve been considering applying for a couple of days, and I just bought an Angel S2 DVD Box Set from choices video (at £55 off! Too good an offer to miss) so I really should start considering the old cash flow. Maybe constructing Sim City 4 style graphs will help me.

[Editor’s notice: I tried to do a nice ASCII thing but the style sheets broke it.]

I’m about to stick some things up on eBay to cover the horrific costs of living. Thank god for overdrafts. I guess I’ll be needing mine in about 6 weeks.

From the University’s weekly newsletter:

“CALLING ALL DEAF STUDENTS”

Perhaps they should write to them…As Nikki pointed out, it’s hardly the most appropriate turn of phrase ;-)

Since my last update, I’ve done very little. Barry Holmes has contracted some form of flu-related illness and as such, my entire week has gone into terminal shutdown. 5 of my 12 timetabled hours are cancelled. Hence, I revert to my natural state: Asleep.

Apparantly, I’ll be e-mailed if I’ve got a Kraft interview this Friday. I dunno if I should be too optimistic, Intel didn’t interview me so perhaps I should’ve considered a more comprehensive rewrite of the CV, though to be honest I think it’s pretty good as it is.

I have been working on the easyworld page of my site quite a bit recently, I think once I’ve finished my alternate versions list and my DIY You & Me slipcase I’ll have a stab at updating the bestof and main page so that my fans don’t become disillusioned.

For all you saligkarphiles, (that’s the closest I could get…) no slugs recently, but Nikki saw a reddish woodlouse.

Well, yesterday I applied to Kraft. It occurs to me if I get an interview I’m going to have to buy some decent clothes…. It’s not that I hate the clothes so much, it’s more the image that goes with them. I couldn’t respect myself if I ended up one of those dipshits that rides on trains in suits with their laptop plugged in looking like I’m doing something incredibly serious and important, in fact, the closest I want to get to that situation is watching cartoons on my laptop on the train…I wonder if it’s actually possible to take a job that promotes that kind of lifestyle when I don’t actually aspire to it, rather just to integrate a job into my present one. All this, and it’s still hard not to want to unleash all forms of rage on these seemingly joyless automated comprimised humans I fear becoming.

Still, if buying a suit gets me £14k a year, then I guess that’s what I’m going to have to do.

Non-sequitarly, I saw the Incredible Hulk TV trailer the other day. It contains copious amounts of fanboy-delighting stuff. The Hulk is a little obviously CGI, but he also looks cool. Let’s just say I’m looking forward to this a lot more than Daredevil…

I ask you all to appreciate the pun-tastic post title, btw.

One smallish black slug near the gaping roof hole and a slight woodlouse on the window-wall.

Today I was treated to an employer presentation by those purveyors of cheese slices, Kraft. Now, you might not know, but Kraft don’t just make cheese, they also make coffee. And, more importantly, they own Terry’s, who make the Chocolate Oranges I consume so heartily as often as possible. The presentation itself wasn’t bad, the guy seemed pretty bitter about having to read out all the American terms the Kraft business model included (such as ‘buddy’), and was bemused by the fact that they not only had to have a “vision” but also that one of the ones he’d come across in his time was known as “The Custard Vision”.

All in all, this mix of cynicism and free choices (and ‘Smart Casual’ dress code) has meant that I was considering applying, but then…then they gave us free (large) chocolate orange bars, so I took two and was convinced to apply.

Ich Bin Krafter! Erm. Or something.

Recently, Paul wrote this article for a Uni project: “No, I won’t fix your computer.”

When writing it, he asked me to read it few and bounced a few ideas off me. I believed it was an astonishingly accurate piece of work that tapped directly into the mentality of every computer geek who is torn away from his life (as non-existent as that may be…) every 15 minutes to fix someone else’s computer.

The article is no more relevant than today, when I was called upon to set up someone’s internet connection. It’s not that I mind helping people who are stuck, especially, it’s just that I mind being called upon to PLUG IN A CABLE, for this is all that was required of me. I exaggerate not. Everything else was ready to go, bar the cable. Worse still, when I did the deed, they said “Oh, even I could’ve done that!” as if it was some amazing feat of intellectual strength to plug the cable into the only hole on the computer that it snugly fits.

It did, however, take an amazing feat of emotional strength to stop from screaming “WELL WHY THE HELL DIDN’T YOU?!” back at them.

Mother of God. I can’t remember the last time I got up at 8am two days in a row. Being back at University has definite disadvantages. I guess my sleeping pattern will adjust to accomodate these ludicrous and unreasonable schedulings, though I wonder which way…